I announced last week that I was thinking of writing my blog again and had not thought much of it until today. I honestly just sat down and started playing around with the theme, the colours and my profile and as I started to actually write I saw that it has been 4 years. WOW.
As I was flicking through my blog, I saw that I had something like 500 viewers. I did not even realise many people were even interested in what I had to say. It spured me on to share with you my experiences of all the many hats that I wear. I have lots of hats; A mum to 2 boys with different dads, this comes with 2 separate hats that sometimes have to go together, a step mum hat , a wife hat, a student hat, a business owner and sometimes I manage to get time in for friends hat ;)
I am not a writer or particularly good at grammar or spelling.... I am sorry if my writing offends the grammar police ;) So why have I decided to write again?
My mum reminded me of the small blog I started in 2013 and so I read it all. I was amazed that it was me. Life is so bloody weird sometimes and it is such a roller-coaster! I re-shared my blog and had some lovely comments and messages from people I had not heard from in ages, they explained how I had inspired them and had made them think about life. That is amazing that my experience and words have helped in that way. What a journey I have been on..... and am still on.
A quick run down;
C is 9 in August, F is 6 in August.
I left my business and my business partner. It was a hideous break-up, something I will never forget and something that shattered my heart. My business partner was my soul-sister. Well so I thought. I learnt the most out of this relationship and I am sure I will share more another time.
As my business broke down, it made room. See I believe that when one person leaves, it makes space for someone else. Remember, people come into your life for a reason. They may only be around for a short amount of time or they may have done you wrong or maybe you just grow apart but even the people that go, they were there for a reason. Anyways, this break down in my business and my relationship left room for someone super special. The Mr. Apart from my Dad, he is the most amazing man ever to me. Hes well-fit too! We got married in April this year and are now Mr & Mrs T-E. As a result, I now have the most beautiful mermaid, my step-daughter. She is 7 and is easy to fall in love with.
3 kids. 5 parents. It is not easy. We all have different opinions and morals about bringing up the kids. However, Chris and I stand strong together and between us we will always work it out.
I continued my business and stayed working for myself (link at top of blog) it is liberating and is extremely enjoyable. I work around my children and my life. It works. Its a lifestyle business. I work to suit my life... I don't live to work. However, something was missing. I have always wanted to be more than what I was, I knew I could be more and I wanted to be more but I was unsure of what more was and how I would get there. Life is a journey and we do adapt as we grow. If we grow. If we choose to grow. Some stay behind.
As I began to rebuild myself after my business break up, I trained for a strong woman competition. Looking back, I feel I did this to prove a point to myself. On this mini journey I met someone who was meant to come into my life. We became buddies,but the type of friend who you can see and talk about the universe too, then not see each other for months and then still continue to talk where you left off. I like people like this. My kind of person. Anyways, she gave me a mental boost and really got me thinking! I went with my gut ....... I wanted to be more than a fitness professional, I want to help women on a deeper level and to influence them at a time that really can make a positive change to their health, body and life. After lots of reading and lots of talking I decided to take myself back into education.
Here I am. Me! I have just finished my higher education access to university course in Chemistry and Biology and finished with 42 distinctions and 3 merits. This hard work has awarded me a place at UWL as a student midwife..... yup I am still going to run my business and I am still going to be a mum. I do not know all the logistics of how it will work but I have a 'kind of' plan in my head and I am going to wing it.
The depression & the anxiety has faded and it gets better each month. The control over the voices in my head are so much quieter. I have bad days and bad moments.... but I can be in control now. I have oodles of love and so much support that not being the best version of me, can not be possible.
Live Love Laugh
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